I'm almost seven years old, I'm almost a teenager...

July 06, 2015

I'm almost seven years old, I'm almost a teenager...

I haven't updated my blog in awhile so let me start by apologizing for the lack of words. Mackenzie got out of school in May and with her home with me, my days got pretty instantly crazy. I love it, having her and Connor both in the house with me during the day is so fun but it doesn't leave much time for.... really anything at all that could be considered me time. I can't even go to the bathroom anymore without someone knocking on the door the second I close it or a baby crying. It's all a happy madness for the most part. Sometimes it's just regular madness and when that happens I have a glass of wine and remind myself they won't be babies forever and I'm gonna miss all the chaos and playtime action when she's a teenager that hates me 99% of the time and fights with me over irrational hormonal reasons she'll think I could never possibly understand. Sigh. Lets not think of the future, it's such a scary place. Right now I'm on vacation at my mom's house in Texas and have been for a couple weeks. It's been nice, I spent last week with my absolutely amazing little nieces, and it was so great to spend some time with them ♡. It was also really great to recognize once and for all that I'm perfectly content with the 2 awesome little chitlins I've already got. There was a brief moment (prolly leftover baby hormones) where I wondered if Mike and I should try to have one more child before my 30s are upon me and I officially stop having children. You know what will make you instantly decide you don't need a third child? Being around 4 of them for a week. A week is just enough time to get a pretty good range of emotions and see the whole scope of what would be.... and you know... two is a good number. There were times towards the end of the week that my mom and me both couldn't even get names straight. We went down the whole list and sometimes made a few names up before we finally settled on "you!" Chaotic but lovely, we had ups, downs, sideways, diagnols, chevrons, plaids, you name it, but it was awesome. I had a great time with those little girls and I miss them already. I'll never say "yeah" the same way again after being around little Julie. Awwww those girls.

So about my title. We went shopping today, my mom, my littles and me. It started out good enough and slowly disintegrated, as tends to happen with children present. Kenzie started getting bored (and somewhat entitled but I'll get to that in a minute.) Connor started getting hungry, the two make a deadly combination that leaves their mother in a frazzled state of "wtf children!" and it was most definitely time to go home. We had to stop in one last store (yes had to) because they had a huge sale on bags and who doesn't need a good bag when you tote around 400 diapers and wipes and bottles and outfits and toys and snacks and you get the idea anytime you leave the house and long story short we got an $88 Vera Bradley bag for $30 bucks so yeah... had to stop. But while we were in there C got fussy enough that I took my moms keys to take him to the car for a new diaper type maneuver, and kenzie stayed with my mom. Presumably asking for more things and getting denied. The kid already cleaned up, made out like a bandit, and other metaphors as well. At this time she made the statement, "well I'm nearly 7 I'm almost a teenager, and nobody let's me do the things I want to." Yep. Let that marinate for a second parent friends. I certainly had to. This prompted a talk about how first of all no, no dear child you are nowhere near being a teenager and thank god for that. Secondly why do you want to be a teenager? She simply shrugged. I opened her eyes to the reality of having more chores more responsibility having to get a job in addition to still going to school (yep a job, I got one and survived, she can do it too). This placated her thoughts enough to end the conversation but I dwelled. Why are kids in such a hurry to grow up? As a grown up I can say there are indeed perks (alcohol, intimate relations without worrying about your parents busting in, .... no others are coming to mind right now but I'm sure there are more) but there's also way more cons (bills, no one washes your clothes for you anymore, all of a sudden you're supposed to make dinner instead of just eat it... I could go on for days here.)
I guess it seems glorious when you're small and get told what to do (or what not to do) constantly and then you see older kids appearing to have more freedom (especially on tv... don't even get me started on the shows marketed towards kids these days good lord give me a break, bring back some Sonic the Hedgehog and Xmen and Batman the animates series, if anyone else has had to suffer through an episode of Jessie or just about any other Disney Channel show than I know you feel my woe on this)
I guess what it came down was that it just saddened me that at the tender age of 6 (I don't care if she's turning 7 in 3 weeks or tomorrow she's 6 untill she's not dammit, she's already getting too big too fast), my daughter is already ready to cusp adulthood and be free of me. That's not what she said of course but seeing as I'm on the verge of being 30 in a few months and my teenage emotions and hormones have been replaced with late 20's post-pregnancy mommyhood emotions and hormones that's certainly how it felt.
And just when I thought I might fall into a funk about it, she came up and hugged me and asked me to tuck her in and stay with her till she fell asleep. You got it babygirl, I'll stay with you forever.

Now here are a bunch of pictures from the last couple weeks in no particular order: