17 things I didn't know I didn't know.

Just kidding. There's no list. Has anyone else noticed all of the randomly numbered lists of 'fill in the blank' lately? "28 things you do if your alive" "7 things people eat" ... I admit I get caught up in the occasional buzzfeed and scary mom article (p.s. have you visited the scary mom webpage? If you haven't you really should. Awesome is not a strong enough word but it's the one I'll use because my dictionary.com app is being a dick.) It's pretty much full of "oh! it's not just me! Thank God!" type stuff.

So anyway. Yesterday was #throwbackthursday in the internet "social" circles. Normally I don't participate but I had some time to kill and happened to be right next to my scrapbook so I started flipping through it. Hilarity ensued. I haven't cracked that thing in a while. It was a little bit amazing, and also a little bit sad to realize I've been the same nerdy fool my whole life lol. Look at how blonde I was!!! And those bare arms! Someone get that girl a tattoo! 

One of the last days of Senior Year. Also a shining example of how I have long been disinclined to wear pants of any sort that could be defined as "well fitting".

On to other news! We have battled and bested a couple nasty infections these last few weeks, both of which unfortunately decided to take root in my poor daughter, and thought back to back would be the best plan of attack. They weren't wrong but we still conquered. Poor kid though. Massive props to my eldest child who proved that even in not feeling good misery she will still smile and laugh and do all the things she does normally... including things that get her in trouble normally because she's got her ol mom dialed in 100% and knows I'm less likely to tell her to knock her shit off if she's sick. It all started on Halloween when I discovered my kid was having a hard time making it to the bathroom all of a sudden. Surprise abounded when she "randomly" had an accident one evening. I use the sarcastic quotes for "randomly" because this had apparently been going on for a few days yet, but she didn't want to tell me because she was scared I'd get mad. (I'll be brief on how this broke my heart, save to say that it did. Broke it right before she jumped on it and kicked the pieces around, there was a long talk about how my baby girl needs be scared of nothing when it comes to me. ...... untill she starts dating but that's a different talk.) So how did we discover this? Throughout the course of trick-or-treating of course. When my little Dorothy knock off started walking a tad funny. I thought her red ruby slippers just happened to be bothering her so we decided to call it an early night and left even though we still had a block to go and Kenzie was insisting she was still good to go. *It's worth noting here the kid doesn't even eat candy. She proudly announced several times through the afternoon that this candy was for her mom lol she just likes attention and she was getting a ton of it in her Dorothy costume because... well... she's awesome.* After making it back to base and inspecting her my candy to ensure Death by Razorblade infested KitKat wouldn't be on the nights docket, I asked if her feet were feeling better yet and she still insisted her feet were fine. It was at this time I started to notice a funny pee type odor but since Connor was in the room I naturally assumed he was just in need of a new diaper. Then Kenzie got up to start walking again and was still doing the weird Frankenstein walk. I asked if she had to go to the bathroom and she leaned in real close and said Mom... can we not talk about this here. (We were at Mike's mother's house which is where we go every year to take her Trick-or-Treating). I glanced at Mike's mom and we quickly retreated to the old apartment behind the garage that we used to reside in to use that bathroom and find out what all the secrecy was about. At this time I discovered 2 massive bright red sore looking hotspots on the inside of my kids thighs, because *lightbulb* she'd been walking around in soaking wet pants and they were rubbing on my kids ultra sensitive skin all day long (For real, this kid used to have to make trips to the ER as an infant if I let her sit in a diaper any longer than 30 minutes or so because her skin couldn't take it and the worst diaper rash ever would break out. I'm talking rash so bad she would bleed. And then we would all cry.). So that was a barrel of laughs the rest of the night (not really, I couldn't have felt any more like a horrible mother for not realizing it sooner. Friggin 6 year olds and their crafty ways.) and since Connor happened to have a doc appt the following Monday, after a super fun weekend of wondering what the hell was going with my kid and why she was running to the bathroom every 45 minutes and STILL having accidents (we did get the rash on her legs taken care of though) I went ahead and brought up to her pediatrician the goings on and what nots and asked if it was possible she had a UTI. They said it was more than likely actually constipation which brings about a lot of the same symptoms... which I had a super skeptical eyebrow raised on because this seems to be the first thing they always tell me is wrong with her and I'm like... well if she's constipated than I'd like a clearer definition of what that means in a kid because she's definitely in there stinking up the bathroom on a daily basis. So they said well... let's get a urine sample. .... OK. And YOU guys are doing that how? Oh... by sending me home with a cup. Got it. Should be a good time. I will condense the story into just letting you know we got through it with no pee getting on me and the sample turned back into the lab with minor infractions. Later that same day, boom. UTI. Got the kid some sulfasomethingorother (which btw tasted AWFUL and she had to take it twice a day. She was a bit of a wimp about it at first as kids tend to be, so I was all cowboy up hoss it ain't that bad look, and stuck my pinky in it and took a lick. This worked enough to get her to down the rest of the cup but let me tell you it was hard to hold a straight face while I waited for her to leave the room so I could turn around and swish some water and do the EWWWW dance. Why do they cherry flavor anything? First of all - nothing at all even resembling a cherry and Secondly - pretty much just setting kids up to hate cherries for the rest of their life.) So two weeks of this and the UTI clears and its her first day med-free and we're just chilling on a fine Friday evening and I can't stop looking at her because (aside from the fact that she's beautiful) her cheeks are like bright red. Like super bright red. And I'm thinking did this kid get into my blush or something? So casually I asked how school went and if they happened to play outside and she said yeah so that was case closed for me, she got a little windburned (it was super windy and cold that day, this was a viable thought.). Until the next morning and the kid is munching down some Captain Crunch and her cheeks... they're even brighter... and her lips are looking pretty chapped. And she keeps itching. Oddly... her nose isn't red at all. If she was windburned wouldn't it have hit her nose first? Hm. So I'm like well lets get some lotion on itchy there before she starts looking like she got in a fight with the cat and again I'm like well the weather is cooling off the dry winter stuff must be drying her skin out. Yeah.
Untill she lifts her shirt up to let me put some lotion on her and I had to take a moment to be like uhhhhh why did you paint red splotches all over yourself? Wait... this is probably a rash why would she do that? In my defense... she would do that. And then it hit me; Red cheeks, Body rash, Super itchy... I should call my mommy and find out what this is! Turns out the kid picked up Fifth Disease. Suh-weet. First of all hat tip to the assholes that decided to end something as mild as an itchy rash with 'disease' because I was a hot damn mess over it. Then I found out nope, itchy rash. Spreads when someone else's little bundle of joy sneezes wildly all over another kid (or coughs). Good news: apparently by the time rash emerges they're no longer contagious. Just funny looking. Also once you get it once you're pretty much immune afterwards (that's what they always say, time will tell on that.) Bad news: Pretty much nothing you can do about it other than let it run its course. Try telling an itchy 6 year old not to scratch. Lol. Not funny. And childrens Benadryl was successfully knocking her out but not doing anything for itch while she was awake and niether was oatmeal lotion or any other "quick" remedy. Fortunately for me genius struck and I remembered I'd asked for an extra can of that spray they give you at the hospital for your lady parts after having an episiotomy and after delivering a 2 foot long 10lb kid, they didn't argue with me. If you've never had a kid or didn't get the spray stuff for whatever reason, it's a spray can of pain reliever/itch reliever for your lady bits whilst you endure stitches and your body healing. I pretty much hosed her down in the stuff and for the first time in 3 days she looked super relieved. 1.5 days and 2 sprayings later the kid was better and back in school sans rash. Good times. 

super red cheeks. 

total cutie pie even not feeling 100%

So that's pretty much been the bulk of the last few weeks. Well that and snow flurries. Guess Winter is finally making it's arrival. Booooooo. Not ready for cold and snow and scraping windows and shoveling driveways. Boo boo boo boooooooo.

I feel obligated to include a list of some sort in here now, so I will list my 5 favorite blogs of the moment.

 1. scary mommy - if you haven't already visited this page, you must. As previously stated. There's awesomeness here.

 2. a mothership down - quite possibly one of the funniest blogs I've read as of late, I'm hopelessly addicted.

 3. a beautiful mess - Longtime favorite full of crafty things I'll probably never be able to accomplish but really wish I could. I've been reading it for about 4 years now and I'm just as hooked now as I was when I read the first entry. Elsie and Emma are the type of adorable most of us wish we could be.

4. The Glamourous Housewife - She posts up a ton of fun projects and ideas, and her fashion blogs are enviable, I want pretty much everything she wears.

5. Franish - Because I will never not love clothes and outfit posts and this chics got lots of neat ones.

Hope everyone's staying warm. Here's some Connor cuteness to help.

This is Connor's favorite sleeping position. Completely sprawled out on mom. lol

Mohawks starting to get up there <3

Also we picked up a Boppy chair!! He likes it even though he can't quiet not look like a drunkie on a bar stool in it yet.